I got nothing. Sitting here with no thoughts at all. Yet I type.

“How’s your day?” I asked my daughter tonight when I got home from work.

“Fine. Uneventful.” She replied.

“Sometimes, uneventful is good,” I replied philosophically, feeling just a tad like Ward Cleaver. And that’s true. Depending on the events, uneventful is often a preferred description of one’s day.

I’ve mastered the one word, “Howzitgoin?” greeting when I pass people in the halls.

Likewise, most have mastered the non-committal response.

“Good Good.”
“It’s going.”
“Alright, alright.”
“Livin’ the dream.”

Sometimes, I like the simple Mayberry greeting as an alternative. “Hey.”

“Hey Andy. Hey Gomer. Hey Barney. Hey Opie. Hey Aunt Bea. Hey Goober.” If you’re watching old Andy Griffith reruns, do NOT play the drinking game and do a shot every time they say, “Hey.” You’ll end up sharing a cell with Otis for the night.

Hey has become a family favorite in my house. It’s a simple utterance that when delivered with a smile acknowledges your affection for being in the same room with a loved one. It can lead to other conversation, but if not, at least you sad “Hey.”

When I was in school in Iowa several years back, I said “Hey” or “Howzigoin” and one guy replied, “Two on a hill.”

His name was Howard Harms and he lived on a farm in Central Iowa. That reply intrigued me, so I asked,

“What’s that mean?”

He said, “Almost every day is two on a hill. A really good day just might be three on a hill. But don’t go three on a hill unless it’s very special. If it’s a bad day, a really bad day, that’s one on a hill. But you shouldn’t have too many of those.”

I asked Howie, “How high does the hill scale go?”

He replied with a smile, “Four on a hill.”

“Ever have one of those?” I asked.

Howie smiled again and said, “Once.”

Somewhere in that cryptic exchange I learned something. Not sure what is was, but maybe it was that the mystic hill is almost always the same. Sometimes there’s ruts that take you down but you shouldn’t let it take you too far down.

And sometimes there’s upward slopes that keep you striving for that special “four on a hill” day. Until that day comes, as long as you keep it at “two on a hill” things will be OK.

I always told Howard Harms I was “two on a hill” whenever I greeted him thereafter. Mainly cause I didn’t know whether the day merited a deviance from the hill scale or not.